Recently, I’ve been working with people who have done an about-face and are eager to clear their accumulations of clutter. For these folks, their desire for minimalism is the complete opposite of the way they had been living. They had been collecting and acquiring things for years, maybe even decades. Suddenly, they wanted to let go of the things they had been holding onto.
As a professional organizer specializing in chronic disorganization, this was a very unusual experience. I was curious and wanted to know what had happened to prompt them to drastically reduce their collections.
Change in Lifestyle
Each one of these clients was prompted by a different change in their lifestyle, a change that required them to look closely at their behaviors, habits, and routines. They began to question the motivation behind their collections. As we talked about their belongings, each one concluded that much of what they had collected no longer fit the life they were planning for themselves.
I am not trying to tell you that this was easy. It was not.
It was filled with questions like these:
- Why did I spend so much money on things I never use?
- What was I thinking?
- How can I get rid of these things without adding them to the landfill?
- Can I get my money back?
- Is it possible to sell these things for as much or more than I paid for them?
There were also moments when these clients were not being kind to themselves. They used negative self-talk, berated themselves, and talked about feeling overwhelmed, guilty, and ashamed for letting things get so cluttered.
Negative Self-Talk
I reminded them that negative self-talk is counterproductive. It doesn’t help in the moment. That sort of talk stalls progress and makes a person feel worse than they already do. Plus, I asked if they would say any of these negative things to a friend. Of course, they said they would not.
I listened and asked how they felt now that they were cultivating their desire for minimalism. Everyone spoke about feeling hopeful and lighter.
I want to be clear that when I’m talking about minimalism here, I am not talking about completely clear shelves, counters, and tabletops with only one or two items beautifully placed. I am talking about organized spaces that contain the things that support my clients’ current lifestyles, along with a few decorative and well-loved items neatly placed.
What Can Prompt a Desire for Minimalism?
Renovating a Home
One client is about to completely renovate their home. They decided to do this because there was a leak in the roof, which led to a leak in the bathroom ceiling. The thought of bringing a repairman in to fix the bathroom ceiling after the roof was patched was out of the question because they were embarrassed that their home was so full.
My client realized that since they wanted to properly fix the bathroom ceiling, they also wanted to renovate and repair the rest of their home.
As we sorted their belongings and furniture, my client looked at everything through a different lens. They thought carefully about whether the things they were considering keeping would have a place in their newly renovated home. They also asked themselves if the items were worth the cost of packing, storing, and then unpacking them.
Changing the space changes the way we think about what deserves to occupy it.
My client made some tough decisions and was excited to meet with the repairmen once the home was emptied.
A Desire to Entertain
Another client has close friends who are moving to Atlanta. These friends are excited to be able to spend more time together, and my client wants to have them over to their home.
They are eager to have an entry that feels welcoming, a family room in which everyone can sit comfortably, a dining table they can sit around, and clear kitchen counters so they can cook with their friends.
When we have a compelling reason to make room, letting go can begin to feel less like losing something and more like creating space for something we want.
Planning to Move
Many people engage in decluttering before they move. In fact, this is the advice most often shared when someone says they are moving. You don’t want to pack and move something you aren’t happy to see when you get to your new home.
These clients were not only moving but also downsizing. They had to figure out how much of their furniture would fit in their new home. Because the new home was smaller, they also had less available storage space.
These clients paid careful attention to moving only the things that supported the life they wanted to live now. They let go of the rest.
How to Cultivate a Desire for Minimalism
Are you looking for something to spur you into action?
The stories I shared indicate that my clients had external reasons that prompted them to reconsider their belongings: renovating, entertaining, and moving. But you don’t need to wait for one of those events.
You can deliberately cultivate a desire for minimalism and motivate yourself to declutter by asking:
- How do I want to live in my home?
- What would I like to be able to do that clutter currently makes difficult?
- Which possessions support the life I’m living now?
- Which ones belong to an earlier version of my life?
- What would having less make possible?
The desire for minimalism isn’t necessarily cultivated by deciding, “I want to own fewer things.” It can come from deciding, “I want more room in my life for this.”
And remember, the kind of minimalism I’m talking about doesn’t mean living in a nearly empty room with one chair.
Minimalism doesn’t have to mean owning as little as possible. It means being more intentional about what you own. Decide to keep what you need, use, love, and have room for.
Minimalism isn’t about deprivation. It’s about making choices.
What surprised me most about my clients wasn’t that they were willing to let go of the clutter. It was that once they had a strong enough vision of how they wanted to live, their relationship with their belongings began to change.
Call to Action
If you’re struggling to let go of clutter, instead of asking yourself what you should get rid of, try asking yourself how you want to live. Having a clear vision for your home and your life can make those decisions easier.
If you would like help figuring out what belongs in the life you’re creating now, I’d be happy to work with you. Contact me to schedule a consultation.
I have had a minimalist attitude for quite some time now. And I think it comes from lifestyle changes. I want to be comfortable, and I want my home to be welcoming. I want a minimal amount of upkeep. I also don’t want a lot of stuff that my family will have to deal with when I die. As I go through my home room by room each year I let go of more items.
It is frustrating to me when working with clients that they say they want a minimalistic easier to care for home but can’t seem to follow through with letting things go.
I get it, Jonda! I’m right there with you!
Sometimes I think I’m becoming a minimalist, but it seems that when I clear out a space, it’s usually to make room for something else. That said, I really do love clutter-free surfaces!
Thanks, Janet! I agree.
I had an experience that sort of opened my eyes to the benefits of minimalism.
Our family moved out of our home to renovate it. We moved into a small place. Our girls had to share a room. I told them they could each bring an “under the bed” box worth of toys, but that was it. I thought they were going to be very unhappy and complain a lot, but they didn’t. Furthermore, when we got home a year later and unpacked, much of what we had stored wasn’t really played with either. It was novel for a couple of days, and then they went back to their favorite things. I had been holding onto too much, and crowding the play space in so doing.
Now, after having worked with client and their stuff for 16 years, I’ve become more and more inclined to simple living. The less I have to manage, the easier it is. I still like having what I regularly use, and I would miss those items if I had to get rid of them, so it is a balance. The key is eliminating what distracts me from my the things I value most.
I agree, Seana. I want to have the things I use regularly and the things I love – everything else isn’t important