If you are a person with hoarding behaviors, the result is probably that you have areas in your home that are very cluttered and disorganized. Trying to get a handle on these tendencies may feel like an overwhelming and insurmountable task. I know, from my experiences as a certified professional organizer in chronic disorganization, that many people with disorganized, cluttered, and piled up homes have a hard time making progress. I’m here to tell you that there are reasons to be hopeful of success.
In this blog post, I’m sharing my top three reasons for anyone struggling with hoarding behaviors to be hopeful.
You Are Not Alone: Support Groups Exist
Did you know that there are all sorts of support groups available for you to join? Some support groups like Clutterers Anonymous have different ways to join in. They offer in-person meetings as well as phone or Zoom meetings.
There are also several empathetic communities on Facebook. People sometimes post a question with a picture and get suggestions. I often participate in these groups as I can offer tried and true solutions to a variety of organizing problems.
One of the reasons to be hopeful when you participate in a support group is there is mutual encouragement. It’s helpful to know that others understand and either are in a similar predicament or have been. Plus, when the group is anonymous, it may be easier to talk about feeling ashamed or embarrassed by the amount of stuff piled around the home. There is a very real sense of community in these groups.
You Can Work Virtually with Professional Organizers
Have you ever wanted to have a professional organizer work with you but resisted the impulse because you were reluctant to open your door? Times have changed my friend. Many professional organizers offer virtual organizing sessions. Since the session is virtual, you have control over what and how much the organizer sees. You can blur your background if you’re feeling anxious.
These virtual organizing sessions with a professional organizer give you the benefit of having a trained expert to guide you as you work to make decisions about the things in your home without having the organizer in your space.
Another benefit of working virtually is the sessions may be easier to schedule as there’s no travel time involved.
I run a clutter support group with my colleague, Jonda Beattie. We meet every Monday for an hour from 12 – 1pm ET. Many of those who have worked with us in this clutter support group for just one hour say that this group gives them reasons to be hopeful they can make sustainable changes in their home.
Small Steps Lead to Big Change
I’m sure you’ve heard this before, small steps lead to big change. Why is this? Every little thing you do adds up. Every time you put something away, remove something you no longer use, or recycle (toss) something that’s broken is a step in the right direction.
As Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. said “You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.”
It may be difficult to discern a difference in the way things look with the naked eye. I suggest taking a picture of the area before you start working on it. Then take another picture after working for three or more sessions. It’s easier to see progress in a photograph.
One Area at a Time
Notice I said, ‘the area’. Pick one small place to start. Continue working in that area until it is ‘good enough’.
The reason to pick one area is that you will make more visible progress if you resist the urge to hopscotch around your home jumping from one small area to another.
Keep a box or a basket handy to use to cart things to other places in your home when you have finished the work session for the day.
Have two other boxes available. One can be for recycling and the other for donations.
Set a Time Limit
Set a time limit for your work sessions. Challenge yourself to see what you can do in one small, specific space in 20, 30, or 40 minutes.
Remember Rome wasn’t conquered in a day.
No matter what you do in the length of time you decide to work, you will have accomplished more than doing nothing.
Words Matter
Remember words matter – even the words you say inside your head when you talk to yourself.
You can set yourself up for failure or success depending on your attitude.
When you notice the change in the photographs, tell yourself (out loud) how proud you are of yourself. Hearing positive words of encouragement helps maintain the momentum.
Track Your Progress
Consider tracking your progress in a journal. Note the date and length of time you worked in an area. Then write down your thoughts. Some days will be easier than others but have faith and understand that every little bit you do is more than doing nothing.
Conclusion
Whether you decide to join a clutter support group, work virtually with a professional organizer, or work on your own following the guidelines I shared with you in this post, there are reasons to be hopeful. You don’t need to do this alone. Change is possible, and help is available when you’re ready.
Diane N. Quintana is a Certified Professional Organizer®, ICD® Master Trainer, owner of DNQ Solutions, LLC and co-owner of Release Repurpose Reorganize. Based in Atlanta, she specializes in helping clients with ADHD, hoarding behaviors, autism, and chronic disorganization. Diane is the author of five books and a contributor to ICD’s latest publication on chronic disorganization, where she wrote the chapter on Aging. She is the current President-Elect of the Institute for Challenging Disorganization and is passionate about teaching practical organizing strategies that stick.
People who struggle with disorganization and clutter often feel overwhelmed and hopeless. I love the three ways you shared for instilling hope.
Hope is so important because it provides an impetus or opening for change. If you give up completely, there will be no movement forward. However, understanding there are resources such as support groups, virtual or in-person organizing, or working in small time blocks, all help.
The other thing your post speaks to is not being alone. So often people think they are the only one with this challenge. Meeting others who have similar challenges, sharing useful strategies, and having guidance make a huge difference.
Thank you, Linda
I love that clutter support group idea, and especially hearing that it makes people feel hopeful. It also adds a touch of accountability, and probably also some sharing of strategies and resources. It really does help to know you are not alone when you are struggling with any challenge.
I love taking photographs. It’s amazing how quickly we forget the way a space used to look, so this is a wonderful way to SEE progress (and maybe also keep us moving forward, because we want it to stay that way).
I love the entire tone of this post, and the evident care, patience, and love you have for those who are dealing with hoarding disorder.
Thank you, Seana. Participating in a group and learning about how other people are struggling with some of the same things can be truly validating. I appreciate your kind words!
I love that people are looking at virtual organizing sessions for hoarders. That’s wonderful. I bet people appreciate that so much. You mentioned blurring the background. Though I bet the clients do not mind seeing the space after they get comfortable with the organizer and they start seeing how they can accomplish their cluttered spaces. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
Thanks, Sabrina. I think sometimes feel more comfortable blurring the background until they are more relaxed and feel that they are participating in a safe space.
As always, Diane, you’ve taken a complex topic where people often feel vulnerable, shamed, and pessimistic and used your warmth and wisdom to make things better. I love that there are so many different support options nowadays, and I know that the support group you and Jonda have created is a boon to all who attend.
Your words of comfort and advice must be a balm to the hearts of so many on the path to gaining mastery over their spaces and behaviors. You are doing essential work!
Thank you very much, Julie.