Connections are like relationships. We have ones that we pay attention to and in which we are fully invested. Then there are other connections that are less important to us, so we give them less attention, yet they are still there. We have connections in many areas of our lives. Think about family, friends, places, food, and belongings. We make connections to all these things. Our connections—and the way we manage them—are impactful. Some support the way we want to live, while others can weigh us down. That’s why it’s so important to work on connections that truly support your life.
Connections to Family and Friends
It doesn’t matter if you have a large or small family, or many friends or just a few. What matters is your connection and what you do with it. My sisters and I joined my brother and his family at his daughter’s wedding recently. It was a marvelous celebration and served to strengthen our family connection.
Much like our habits and routines, connections can either support us or hinder us. Family and friends are invaluable when they listen, try to understand us, and offer love, support, and objective help when needed. These connections become challenging when we experience a lack of interest, understanding, or when we are met with criticism and judgment.
This is a two-way street. Positive connections require nurturing. Just like habits and routines, the more we practice them, the more ingrained they become.
People are more likely to listen and support us when they feel listened to, understood, and supported themselves. While this may not always hold true, showing genuine interest and asking thoughtful questions often strengthens the connection.
Why is this important?
People need other people. As the song made famous by Barbra Streisand reminds us, we are happier and more resilient when we are connected to others. There is also a growing body of research showing that our brains benefit from meaningful social interaction.
Connections to Places
Think about a time when you had fun at a specific place. The memory likely makes you smile and may even inspire you to return. That’s a positive connection.
On the other hand, a negative experience can discourage you from going back.
It’s often easier to work on connections to places because you can choose where you go. Restaurants, hotels, and even event venues are places you select. When possible, choose places that support positive experiences and let go of those that don’t.
Connections to Food
It can be more challenging to work on connections to food. Most of us know it’s important to eat in a way that supports our health, which sometimes means saying “no” to foods we crave.
For some, health concerns may require limiting or avoiding certain foods altogether. This can be difficult, but it’s often necessary.
Our connection to food is also emotional. For example, I love snack foods and could easily snack throughout the day instead of eating regular meals. But I choose to plan balanced meals instead, supporting the way I want to feel and function.
How about you? How do you work on connections with the food you eat?
Connections to Belongings
Just like food, our connections to belongings can be complex.
Ideally, the things we own should support the way we want to live. However, we often hold onto items beyond their usefulness because of emotional connections.
If you want to work on connections with your belongings, consider asking yourself:
- Am I keeping this only because I love the person who gave it to me?
- Do I love this item?
- Do I use it now?
- Will I realistically use it in the future?
- Is there a meaningful historical family reason to keep it?
- Is it a verified antique with real value?
- Does it make me happy?
- Does it make my life easier?
A Final Thought: Choose Connections That Support You
When you take time to work on connections, you begin to see which ones truly support your life – and which ones do not.
The goal isn’t to eliminate every difficult or imperfect connection. Instead, it’s to become more intentional. Strengthen the connections that uplift you, bring you joy, and help you live the life you want. Gently release or reshape the ones that don’t.
Small, thoughtful changes in how you approach your connections can lead to meaningful shifts in how you feel every day.
If you’d like support as you sort through your connections, whether with your belongings, routines, or spaces, reach out to me. I’d love to help you create systems that truly support your life.
Send me an email to schedule a free 30-minute consultation; diane@dnqsolutions.com
FAQs
Why is it important to work on connections?
When you work on connections, you become more intentional about what supports your life. This can improve your emotional well-being, decision-making, and daily routines.
How do I know which connections are helping me?
Supportive connections make you feel understood, energized, and aligned with your goals. Draining connections often leave you feeling stressed, overwhelmed, or stuck.
Can I really change my connections?
Yes. While you may not control every relationship, you can change how you engage with people, places, food, and belongings.
What’s the first step to work on connections?
Start by noticing how you feel. Awareness is the first step. From there, make small, intentional choices that support your well-being.
How does this relate to organizing?
Your connections to belongings directly impact clutter. When you work on connections, it becomes easier to decide what to keep and what to let go.
I love how you are able tie these seemingly disparate areas together using Connections. Using this approach creates an easy framework for someone to use to determine if their behavior toward people, places, and things is aligned to their values. Sometimes I fall into bad patterns and I’m sure I am not alone! I like the idea of looking at how my behavior is tied to a person, place, or thing on the other end. If I am gravitating toward a bad connection then it might be time to break that pattern!
Thanks, Jill!
I love the way you remind us of the importance of working on connections in all areas of our lives.
When I think of connections my mind first goes to family and friends. I know how important it is to work on keeping those connections strong and true.
I am conscious of what I eat and why but really never thought about it as a connection. But, of course, what I eat is connected to my health and how I feel.
As I age, I become more aware of my connections to my belongings. As with our family and friends, the items we keep and value take time and effort. Knowing this, I am continually downsizing what I keep so that I can use my resources wisely.
Thank you! I really like that you are continually evaluating your connections.
I knew I’d love this post, just based on the title! Connections are very important to me, and CONNECTING was my word-of-the-year for 2023. It was primarily about my relationships with others (online and in person) but also about connecting my photography hobby with my business by using more of my original photos instead of stock photos on my blog. I’m still working on that, but I’m using more than before!
That’s so fabulous, Janet!
I love this post, I totally agree. For a more balanced and healthy life, we must all examine these areas to bring a better awareness to how we look at them.
I have been examining my food connection for years, since I was 14, and it is one area I had to figure out for myself, since no one could help me understand why I was sensitive to so many things. A nutritionist helped me get started and I have been modifying and learning new tips ever since.
Now, in my 50+, I have been observing that other friends and family are now looking at their connection to food, and since they haven’t done it for many years, they are feeling overwhelmed.
I am grateful that I kept the connection going and figured out what worked for me to serve my body and energy. While I still have issues, I now know ways to deal with these issues and where to go for information.
It’s important to be open to possibilities we may not have considered through this connection process. Being stubborn will do no one any good. Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Diane.
Thank you, Sabrina. I had an idea of your strong connection to food based on some of the terrific recipes you’ve shared in social media. Understanding our connections to these different aspects of our life is really important.
That’s such a terrific photo. Looks like a great time!
I love how you tie together connections and intentionality. For me and my family, these certainly go hand in hand as we are spread out all over the place. I can’t really just “drop by” and see my family, so it takes intention. I do think that intentionality requires that we focus.. that we stop and pay attention, and we are likely to make decisions that we are pleased with when we do this.
We really do have connections with so many aspects of our lives: stuff and people both! Great way to think about this.
Thank you, Seana. My family is very spread out – it was so much fun to catch up with cousins, nieces and nephews at my niece’s wedding. It got me thinking about other connections and our relationships with them.